What's in a Name?

"My name is John...Jonas John"

Err...but it doesn't end there.

"....Arun Jonas John"


Now, I dont have anything against the name Arun personally. And Iam also proud of having one 'Indian' name besides my other more 'videshi' ones, but when it happens to be one of the most common first names south of the Vindhyas and also begins with the first letter of the alphabet, it can be a real pain sometimes.

My baptism ceremony, Church, some 23 odd years ago....

The usual rush, the usual crowds, the usual discussions.
Aunty1 - So what's the final decision on your dear's name?
Appa(proudly) - Jonas John
Aunty2 - But...you mean to tell me he will have only two names? How is that possible? No one has just two names! You have to give him a third!
Amma - That's what I was telling him all the while! Now see what's happened!
Appa(confused) - But I thought....OK, it's still not too late. We can still have a third name.
Uncle1 - Call him Jacob!
Appa - That would make it JJJ. No way!
Grandma - Abraham!
Appa - A shorter name, please.....
Amma - I want an Indian sounding name. He has enough of Biblical ones.
Aunty1 - Ramesh!
Amma - Isn't that a Hindu name?
Uncle2 - Selvaratnam! Very Tamil!
Appa - Too Tamil!
The Priest walks up - Are we ready yet? It's getting late for the ceremony.
Appa - Yes, Father. {to others}Give me a name fast!
Cousin1 - How about Arun?
Appa - Great! Arun it is! Arun Jonas John. Let's begin, Father!

They say they couldn't stop me crying during my baptism.

Ever noticed how Christian names tend to evoke a sense of exoticism in people? One of the advantages of being a miniscule religious minority in such a vast country. I wish my name atleast had been Jonas Arun John.
Consider this.
You are being ushered in to meet your potential boss for an interview and the secretary says, "Sir, a Mr. Arun is here to see you." The response would be, "Ho hum, send him in...."
But if it had been, "Sir, a Mr. Jonas is here to see you.", he is more likely to go, "Sounds interesting, send him in!"
You would no longer have to wory about creating an impression, only about maintaining one! And of course, there are a few other reasons too....

My school, 12th standard, some 5 years ago....

Half-yearly exams are just a week away.

Friend - Prepared for the French exam yet?
Me - Naa, not much to prepare, is there?...and still got a week, anyway.
French Teacher walks in - Bon jour! Students, an announcement to begin with. Due to time clashes, we have had to prepone the French viva to today. Now, dont look so shocked, it's only a viva, after all! (smiles)
Friend - Only a viva?! What a joke!
Me - Gimme the French book! Gimme the French book now! Good thing we're sitting at the back of the room. She should take some time before getting to us!
Friend - But I thought you didn't have much to....
Me - Shut up and mug!!
French Teacher - Now, Iam going to call you for the viva individually in the alphabetical order. So, let's see, .....yes, Arun! Let's begin with you. Come up here please.

My friend sniggers, I scowl.

An uncommon name is a great asset to have while making conversation with strangers. With mine, they automatically tend to relate it with the few great personalities they know having the same name. I quite enjoy that, coz I've played that game quite a few times and I know the rules quite well by now.
"Jonas?...so is Bjorkman your favourite tennis player?" "Err..no, but I do follow tennis quite closely....blah, blah..."
"Jonas?...I've always been fascinated by the story of Jonah in the whale's stomach!" "Oh yes, three whole days! Can you imagine that?....blah, blah..."
A couple of really knowlegdable dudes have actually come up with, "Jonas?...so do you run after mosquitoes like Salk did?"
Alas, no chance of any fun like this with Arun. Much too common, you see.

My cubicle, my office, last week...

Everyone's hard at work in their respective Dilbertian cubicles. The lone phone which receives calls from the outside world and is strategically located at the farthest corner of the room, starts ringing.
A guy answers it and then calls out, "Arun, call for you!"
"Hmmm...now who could that be, calling me now?" I wonder as I rise to my feet in my cubicle.
And I see 4 other heads rising simultaneously from their cubicle kingdoms along with me. We look at each other uncertainly, hesitantly, almost sheepishly. A few gesticulations between us later, the Arun closest to the phone gets to answer the call. Incidentally, it happens to be his call as well. Once that's established, the other 4 Aruns sink back into their cubicles.
10 minutes later, the phone rings again and the call goes out again, "Arun, call for you!"
"Oh no, Iam not falling for that one again!" I smile to myself and sit tight.
A minute later, an irate face appears at the partition of my cubicle and asks, "Didn't you hear me calling you! You are Arun, aren't you?"
"Err,..I think so"...sheesh!

My mail ID doesn’t have Arun in it. Neither does my signature. Nor does my blog (except for this one, that is).But inspite of my best efforts, most people continue to call me Arun. Because we like the name, is the convenient reason given. I know people are more comfortable with familiarity, but still.....

Anyways, Iam branded for life and I might as well accept it!